come along children

What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

Pencils are yellow, Grass is green OK

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interru--- MOO! I'm so sorry, I have Tourette's Syndrome and cannot control these sudden outbursts. Please continue.

Whats a good source of iron? A piece of iron.

What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

AROUND

Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

why did helen keller fall down the stairs A; i pushed her

A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

knock knock you may come in

I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

Once upon a time, there was boy. I saw this boy. So I sat on him.

What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

Why was the boy un-able to talk He was retarded

9/11 isn't funny. 19 Muslims died that day.

A chicken walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll it be?" His friends are very concerned about his sanity.

what do you call a black priest? holy shit!

Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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