Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? It's everybody in the world telling you to stop re-using this joke.

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, dogs can't speak English.

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What's big, black, wide, long, and has white lines all over it? A new highway road.

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Your mom is so old, -just kidding. I know she died at a young age.

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What is yellow and sleeps alone? Yoko Ono.

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How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

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Have you heard the one about the drunk cleaning lady? I haven't either but I bet it is good. That is a pretty good premise for a joke.

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Johnny just finished his pie.

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Roses are red violets are next thing you know my D*** is in you

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Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

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A girl walks into a bar. She's a lesbian.

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A duck walked up to a bad hearing drug dealer, and dealer asked duck, "What you do want?" A duck said, "Quack!" So dealer gave duck a crack

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once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra but like he actually did not a bar a womens breats.

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What's big, black and long? The line in KFC

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Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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Two girls were sitting quietly. Badum tss

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

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What did the peanut butter say to the jelly?

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You're pretty... PRETTY UGLY

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Carlton

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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