Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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Q: why did sally fall off the swing A: she had no arms A:knock knock Q:who is there A:not sally

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Q:Where does a woman work at if she has a job? A: IHOP!!!

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johann grayson being liked

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 killed 6's family

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Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

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Why did the doctor wear glasses? Because he was a whale.

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Why was the salsa spicy? It has a mixture of many spicy peppers.

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A black man walks into a Subway restaurant, and goes up to the counter. The cashier already knows that he's going to order the chicken, but how does he know? Because the black man is a regular, and orders the same thing every time.

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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How do you tell if your sister is on her period? Cause your dads dick tastes funny...

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Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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How do you have safe sex? Cut your own balls off

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Two black guys walk into a bar. Bartender asks them what they want to drink.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

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A catholic priest invited one of Sunday school students to his house one night. They watched a movie and the boy was home before his bedtime.

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What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

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A. Knock-knock. B. Who's there? A. Hey, your doorbell's broken.

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What did the pickle say to the cucumber? I am you from the future!

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

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Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops