how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

An Asian man walks into a bar and ask the Barman for a beer, the Barman is racist and therefore tells the Asian man to leave his pub. The man goes home and drowns his children in the bath and pushes his wife down the stairs, he is found out by the police and is given a life sentence in jail. 5 years later the Barman kills someone in a bar fight and is also sent to jail for life. The Barman meats the Asian man in prison and they settle there differences with a handshake. Two days later the Barman was stabbed in the neck.

Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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What happened to the Jew who went to France? He had a very enjoyable time and visited many of the remarkable landmarks around the country.

Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Betty. Answer the door!

What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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