Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

Little Jimmy had walked in on his parents. "Mummy what are you doing with dad?" "Baking a cake" She replied. Two hours later the cake had then cooled and was consumed by all.

What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

i'm an inbred jew - Barras

Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

Jesus Christ

roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

A Great White Shark eats a baby seal's mother. Great White Sharks don't feel remorse.

Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

Q:What's black, wrinkled and smells like raisins? A: A raisin.

Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

Q:what do you call a black man with blonde hair flying a plane? A: A pilot

Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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