what did one waiter say to the other? were waiters.

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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what did the jew say to the other jew in WWII?..... "We're both going to die."

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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An american, canadian, and mexican are on a skyscraper. Canadian: (pulls off maple leaf) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) Mexican: (pulls out burrito) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) American: (looks at mexican) we have to many of these in our country (pushes mexican off building)

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why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

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A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

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Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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