An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

What do you call a black man in the south? An example of diverse America

I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

All of these jokes are about white people

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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