Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

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Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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Error 37.

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Why did the guy fail his driving test? He was blind.

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What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

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Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

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A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

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What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

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I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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