Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

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What is your name? My name is Jeff

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Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

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What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

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Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

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My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops