How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

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Whats SxB-Tin+Shack+b= SB FUCKING B

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Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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A Muslim and 2 French people walked into a bar They start to have a nice conversation about Charlie Hebdo

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my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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Why couldn't the mexican make a taco? He died.

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What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

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Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

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Why was the blonde confused? Because someone was dressed in a chicken costume throwing pinecones at her.

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Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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Im taking a shit right now.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

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Why did the retarted kids head get stuck in the window? It was a very small window

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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