What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

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My cat just died.

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A gay guy asks a boy out and a girl The girl said no but the guy said yes And the two gay guys went to dinner And made out

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Why did the puerto rican cross the road? To get back to his country, but then he realized there wasn't a road then fell in the ocean and drowned.

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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I used to say "I used to be an adventurer like you but then I took an arrow to the knee" like you but then I took an arrow in the knee.

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Why can't dogs fly? Because they do not have wings.

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How do you make a clown sad? You kill his family.

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You die of loss of blood, under a pile of first-aid kits

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Q: Whats red and not a penis A: A lot of things

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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What is green and if it fell on you from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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Why was it sad for black guys drove off a cliff? There two more seats

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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