A dyslexic man walked into a bra

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What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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Yo mamas so dirty she has to take showers regularly so the stench of her pungent body odor is at a minimum.

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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Do You Know You Have Cancer?

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1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

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Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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My cat just died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops