How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Racist Math Ahmed is on a train from D.C to New York the train is traveling at 125 mph. the distance between New York and D.C is 250 miles. How many will die in the blast.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the blond say to the ginger Stop drop and roll your hairs on fire

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

did you know that zach is the coolest person ever? no? well now you know

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you blindfold an asian? step 1: Fold your blindfold into a triangle step 2: Wrap blindfold around the head of the asian step 3: Tie the blindfold on the back of the asians head step 5: You forgot 4 step 6: Your finished step 4: Tighten the blindfold Now you know how to blindfold an asian ˜´??

thumb_up thumb_down -11

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A guy walks into a bar and laughs. Later, a green, homosexual dinosaur dentist escorts him out to play a houdini banjo.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I like that, but why am I happy?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why dont you throw rocks at a mexican on a bike? its unethical and can severely hurt the individual on the bike

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops