Your momma is so fat, when she bent down to get a peice of wood, she fell down the steps.

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:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

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Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

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How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

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What's the difference between a boodle and a scoodle? Ladoodle!

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How do you kill a dwarf? You put rope around his neck and attach the other end to a concrete slab. Proceed to then through him in the ocean.

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

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What did the man with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike

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What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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[Insert anti-joke here]

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Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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why did the man steal change from the tip jar? he wanted another state quarter for his collection

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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Why did the man think inside of the box? Because he was inside of the box.

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Knock knock Who's there The police The police who? Ma'am your son is dead

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A giant storm loomed over a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who has been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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I saw Scarface uncut last weekend. It was called Face

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A Canadian walks into a bar, he rubs his head, steps around the bar, and walks into a bar. He has a great time hanging out with his friends and having a few drinks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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