What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple except for the elephant.

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Hi. He said it in sign language.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What would Martin Luther King Jr. do if he was alive today? Scream at the top of his lungs as he tried to punch out the top of his coffin.

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What happened to the man who ate a piece of pizza after doing a lot of sit ups, while rubbing the belly of a fat man, and feeding his baby at the same time? He Lived

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Why did the white girl become a lesbian? Because she was raped and had no more trust in the male gender.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Your mother just died.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

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What do you get when you cross an own and a bungee cord? My ass

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There is a law in california that says that women are not allowed to drive with house coats.

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How do you stop an aboriginal from drowning? Take your foot off his head...

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What's both fun and a scam? -The holocaust

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If You Bend Over Some More I'll Eat That Booty Too

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what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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You know what's cool? Yep.

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Knock Knock Dude there is no door

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knock knock... ...no answer

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What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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