what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Meanwhile in the basement...an elderly man, who lives a lone and whose children lead their own lives and dont have much time for him, lies on the ground unable to move after having falling down the stairs. He has been there for 2 days. He is frightened and confused, he hears someone knocking and his hopes perk up, he tries to call but due to lack of water his mouths is too dry to do so. He sobs in frustration. Knock Knock [Silence] The old man cries, aware of his fate.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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What is black and has no education A tire.

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Q-What do you call a dog with no legs? A-Nothing because he cant come over to you anyway..

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Why did the teacher need sunglasses? Because she taught in a classroom with a very big window and the sun kept getting in her eyes.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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what is yellow and burns? -a fire

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What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

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diarrhea.

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Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

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A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

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A Black Guy, A Rabbi, And A Mexican walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says "Get Outta Here We're Closed!"

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Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

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What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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