See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

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why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

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i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

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homosexual rights to marriage

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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What do you call a someone who steals from a black guy? A thief.

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

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How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops