- Anti Joke

A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

A Catholic, a Protestant, and a Jew are stranded in the middle of the ocean on a raft. They all die of dysentery.

A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

-2

a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

-2

What did the policeman say to the man robbing the bar? Stealing is wrong. Then the police read the man his Miranda laws.

-2

You wake, and up for a second you are dazed. Then you open your eyes slowly because you are afraid of what is to come. You then remember oh right I had a sleepover at john smith's house.

-2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

knock knock, who's there me me who he opens the door a kills yo

why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday