Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

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Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

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Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

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Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

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What do you call a Mexican? Whatever his name is you racist.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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None of the sex jokes are not funny or not funny. They're just inappropriate.

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Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

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What did the Jewish girl do when I asked for her number? Roll up her sleeve...

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Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

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why was the kid crying his dad is a alchoholic

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Why is a dog smarter than a human? Because you an asshole if you believe me

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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what happened to the girl next door ? she was brutally murdered.

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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