How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

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A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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why are anti-jokes so funny? Because you are expecting them to encompass one idea of irony, but instead sometimes give a logical explanation to the question.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

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What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

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Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

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What did the boy eat for lunch? - His mother.

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Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

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Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

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Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

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why did your mom die? Cuz i killed her

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What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

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Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs? I don't know, that's why I asked you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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