Why did the dog die? He was old

Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know either.

Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sarah!

Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

Knock knock It's open, come in

Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

Whats Stupider than john? Nothing.. he's certifiably retarded

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Will farrow now gimme your hentai"

What did the man say to the prostitute? Can I pay you to come with me to a cheap motel and partake in sexual intercourse with me?

What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

What was the color of the big lipped, struggling rap artist who violently raped and killed a young woman after robbing a convenience store at gunpoint? Red. He was covered in blood.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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