What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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Q. Why did the little girl drop her ice cream? A. She dropped it as she got into the van

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Q: What do you get when you get a bunch of people who confuse dark humor for anti humor? A: This website.

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Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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what are you mike bibby?

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

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Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

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If polar bears were pink they'd be very easy to find

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You look like Susan Boyle f**ked Snooki and then got hit by a truck.

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

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What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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Jimmy: Knock, knock, Grandmother: Who's there? Jimmy: Jimmy Grandmother: Jimmy who? And then Jimmy held back tears as he knew grandmother's Alzheimer's disease was getting worse.

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Why are Mexicans so good at jumping, swimming and running? They aren't. You're just racist.

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

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Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

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what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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