How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

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How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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Who would win, Chuck Norris or a T-Rex? The T-Rex, Chuck Norris would get ripped apart like any other human-being.

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Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

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Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

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What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

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:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

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knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

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why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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roses are red violets are blue the thing in the toilet reminds me of you :)

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? This is a psychological question which the egg came from the chicken, but the chicken also came from an egg, so the world may never know exactly.

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:y do people talk? ;idk :oh then nevermind

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Why did the Mexican fall off of a cliff? He lost is ballence.

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Why did Chuck Norris eat a sandwich? Because he was hungry.

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Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

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Q) A Christian, slightly disabled but perfectly capable man has a packet of Jaffa Cakes. He strolls casually toward the edge of a cliff, rapidly checking his watch. The man slowly examins the packet before gradually opening the packaging. First the box, then the packet. He quickly throws the jaffa cakes over the edge of the cliff, Why? A) The man doesnt like jaffa cakes

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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