Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

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Q: a black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? A: The mexican. They're going to the bookstore to get some books.

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moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

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Why couldn't the little boy open his bedroom door? He was dead.

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Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

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knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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Who was the best Call of Duty World at War Player? A: Hitler he had 6 million kills and only 1 death

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Detroit has a low crime rate

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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Why did the black man vote for Obama in the presidential election? Every person over the age of 21 has an open opinion to vote for the person of their choice to run as president for a 4-year term.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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