What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man, and an American man are all on a plane in-flight when the pilot screams over the intercom, "We are two pounds over weight! The plane is going down unless you all throw off useless things that have no value in your countries!" The Chinese man throws out a pair of chopsticks and an egg roll and says, "I have too many of those in my country." The Mexican does the same with a taco and sombrero, repeating, "I have too many of those in my country." The American looks around his items pondering what things are too common in the USA. He locks his eyes on the Mexican. The other passengers are shocked as the American throws off a hamburger and a football.

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What's worse than dividing by zero? Chuck Norris dividing your face!

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A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

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What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

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Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

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You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

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Whats the difference between black people and white people? They're both people.

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Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

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my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

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What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

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What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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I just threw up..In my pants.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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