How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

A banker makes some poor economic investments with other people's money. turns out the people can never get the money back. the banker walks away like nothing happened. the government does nothing to prosecute the man. Somewhere in there his wife leaves him.

A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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