Knock Knock Come in

knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

Q: What's the difference between Rush Limbaugh and the Hindenburg? A: One is a huge, flaming, Nazi gasbag, and the other is a drug-addicted talkshow host.

why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

Why were Billy's parents laughing at him? Because he was just diagnosed with cancer!

What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

Whats brown and drives people around? A cab driver of south asian decent. Finding a job that alligns with their qualifications and experience is not always possible, so they take up menial jobs to survive and provide for their family.

Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

How many sumo wrestlers does it take to lift a huge rock? The point of lifting a rock just to lift a rock is stupid, so why would you get 3 sumo wrestlers to come out and waste their time.

What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

once there was an anti-joke. it wasn't well thought out or even very creative. what happened to the anti-joke's premise? it got undermined or reversed in the punchline. but the punchline was way too straightforward. so, the whole joke really ended up sucking.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

A lady forgot to feed her goat. When she went to feed it, It wasn't there. Why? She didn't have a goat. Another lady forgot to feed her cat. When she went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? It died 2 days earlier. A man forgot to feed his cow. When he went to go feed it, it wasn't there. Why? They had ate it for dinner last night. A teenage boy forgot to feed his hamster. When he went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? He spent so much time playing video games that it ate itself. So the boy had his mom make him a sandwich.

Why doesn't the chicken cross the road Because his dad got ran over by a car when he crossed the road

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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