Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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What do you call a panda without a head? Dead.

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What does china and an 80 year old body builder have in common? They're both asian. I forgot to mention that the body builder is japanese.

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What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

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What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

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Why was 95 lb jack able to chug so fast? Because he is a diabetic

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

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Why did the little girl have grass stains on her white dress? Because she was dragged into the forest and raped.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

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Did you ever notice how Bill Nye has a "labrotory" filled with young innocent children? hmmm, very suspicious!

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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You are as dumb as a dumb looking person.

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

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I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

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why dont they make black forks

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What did the cow say to the farmer who was driving by in a tractor? MOOOOOOOO!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not intelligent enough to realize the hazardous dangers of crossing the street.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Due to the height of the fall, one of his ribs pierced his heart and he also suffered extensive head trauma and internal bleeding due to the force when he hit the floor, where he lay in agony for several hours before dying a slow, painful death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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