Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

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What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

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Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

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roses are grey violets are grey im color blind

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Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

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why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

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Where did Wendy decide to work for her part time job? TACO BELL

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Why did the little girlbnot wake up? Because her mother smothered her in her sleep.

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Why couldn't the girl talk... she chocked to death -Alan Davis

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Why did the white man buy a new pair of socks? His old ones has holes.

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What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

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think twice or at least think

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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