There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

why did the blond cross the road? she doesnt know either

what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

Pencils are yellow, Grass is green OK

Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

BIG PENIS

there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

nathan palmer has a big head !

What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

AROUND

Goat balls.

What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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