GUY 1: Mann, I just got done working out, check out my forearms!!! GUY 2: You only have two silly!!

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

What did the black man say to the white man? Hello.

What is black blue and screaming? Your daughter when i kicked the shit out of her

What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

What's sweaty, fat, and Italian? Italians

How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

What's worse than being human? Nothing... No I literally mean nothing at all. Like not being anything?

a guy is driving home his wife calls him and she say's be careful there is a lunatic driving on the wrong side of the road towards traffic he then reply saying they all are

Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

I hate you.

All dead all doom or all dead? How can you choose the question doesn't make sense. dead all dooom ohhhaklsdjfla;ksdjfal;skfjasd

A three legged dog walks into a saloon. He is quickly removed, as it was an establishment for humans and not for dogs.

your mamas so fat she falls out f both sides of the bed

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

Robin, get into the Batmobile.

There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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