If shes old enough to count..... Then having sex with her would be considered illegal.

knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

a priest, a bishop and a cardinal walk into bar to hand out pamphlets about alcoholism

A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

Want to hear a joke? Sorry, you're looking at the wrong website.

You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

You're pretty... PRETTY UGLY

Yo mama so poor... that she possesses substantially less money than the average person working hard in order to accumulate money today.

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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