What did the man say to hitler? hi hitler.

Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because its ears were nailed to the floor.

Why did suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Whos there NOT SUZY!

Why don't chickens where pants? Cause they're animals,duh.

What's the difference between peanut butter and jam ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

Your momma is so fat that she has really high cholesterol but also an undoubtedly warm personality.

Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

Well, this is fun.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Whose there? A chicken.

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

why did the boy drop her ice cream? -he got hit by a bus

Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

The WNBA.

A man walks into a bar... ...because he is blind.

Q: What did 0 say to 8. A: Nothing...However multiplied they equal 0

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

what do you call 4 terrorists going off a cliff in a car? A waist because you can fit 2 more in the trunk.

whats funnier than the boy with no arms and legs getting cancer? lebron playing basketball

Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...