Yo Mama's so fat, she weighs more than an electron.

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your mamas so fat when she puts on a belt she has to use a bomarang to get it around her.

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Which is the closest animals to humans? Black people (nig3gers)

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What do you call a bunch of black people in a red car.... A jaffa

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When is a door not a door? When it is a cup.

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Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

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Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

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how do you get a blue waffle? paint your vagina blue

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what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot. What are you, racist?

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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Santa Clogged my toliet

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What is brown and has 3 legs? My severely injured cat.

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What is black blue and screaming? Your daughter when i kicked the shit out of her

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It gets very hot in Mianus, Connecticut

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Why couldn't dracula's wife get to sleep? She had insomnia.

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Q: What did the man with no arms and no legs receive for Christmas? A: Cancer

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How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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What do you call an aircraft piloted by a Muslim extremist? The aircraft's brand name followed by its model number, in all likelihood.

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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Your Momma’s muscle to fat ratio can only be explained in irrational complex numbers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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