Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

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Humpty dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty dumpty had a big fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men did not come to help him because the United States does not have a patriarchal system of government.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

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Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

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Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

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womens rights

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Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

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Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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Three blondes were stuck on an island, one of them wished for a motorboat, later on they all died of starvation

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A dirty joke: The white horse fell in the mud.

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I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

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im jewish

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Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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Whats long and hard? a pole

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What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

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Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

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WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

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An antijoke

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Q:Where does a woman work at if she has a job? A: IHOP!!!

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Why are anti jokes funny? You can trick an old person to think they are

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What's longer then Kim Kardashian's Wedding? 73 days.

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I had a dream I watched Inception.

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how do you spell ugly ? U G L Y.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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