What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.

Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

So, a Hispanic, Jewish, Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "Aren't you tired of this?"

So a man walks into a bar, right?

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

bangers and mash?

Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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