Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

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Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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Pain Olympics.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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What did the little boy with cancer get for his birthday .............. Nothing because he died before his birthday

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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what came first the chicken or the chips

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Why was 95 lb jack able to chug so fast? Because he is a diabetic

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not intelligent enough to realize the hazardous dangers of crossing the street.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

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You are as dumb as a dumb looking person.

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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