Why did the little girl have grass stains on her white dress? Because she was dragged into the forest and raped.

What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

What does china and an 80 year old body builder have in common? They're both asian. I forgot to mention that the body builder is japanese.

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

You are as dumb as a dumb looking person.

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

Did you ever notice how Bill Nye has a "labrotory" filled with young innocent children? hmmm, very suspicious!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not intelligent enough to realize the hazardous dangers of crossing the street.

How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

What do you call a panda without a head? Dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stock market crashed 600 points today, and his retirement account took a hit. He can't afford his car anymore.

what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...