why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

What happens if you come across an elephant in the jungle?. You wipe it up What happens if an elephants comes across you in the jungle? Swim

Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

How do you get Sally of the swing? Throw a clown at her.

What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

Why could the grandma chew? She couldn't she had no teeth

I have a dirty joke. Yesterday I fell in the mud.

Jesus walks on water, Humans are 70% water, I can walk on humans, Therefore i am 70% Jesus.

A man walks into a bar. Suddenly, he is filled with a strange feeling, as if his life is somehow the subject of a stupid joke. He walks back out of the bar and consults a psychiatrist.

what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

What did the octopus say to the lion? Nothing, because the likely hood of a lion and an octopus meeting is incredibly slim, as an octopus is a sea creature, and a lion isn't. A lion and an octopus cant even communicate with each other anyway, so even if they did come across each other they wouldn’t be able to talk. Octopi are also anti-social creatures by nature so I can say with some confidence that the lion and the octopus will not have a convocation. Written By JAMES!

The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

Your momma is so short, she needed my help to reach something off the top shelf.

What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

Your Mamma So Fat The Old Thing That Block's Her From Destroying Kid's Party's Is The Front Door

What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

What do you call a black man flying a plane ? - a pilot.

Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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