How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

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Hello

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Roses are red Violets are red Everything is red If you are dead... Or a potato

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What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF! What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF HOLDING ITS BREATH!

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Why do Africans live in slums Because they have aids

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

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Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll

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whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

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I have a left shoe. I have a right shoe. I have two feet

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Dana Cohen not having herpes.

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Why did Jill come "tumbling" down the hill after Jack broke his crown? She fell running on a hill, essentially why Jack broke his crown.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

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why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

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Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena

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Global Warming.

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what is one black person on the moon? Anser: a problem What is all the black peaple on the moon...... a solution.

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Billy was walking along the sidewalk. He strayed into someone's yard. He got run over by a lawnmower because he couldn't see with the frog he had stapled to his face.

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gay marriage.

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Rose's Are Red Violet's are Blue You Should Be In A Zoo Dont Worry Ill Be There Too But I Wont Be In A Cage With You Ill Be Laughing At You.

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Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The IRS *locking noise*

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What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

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What happened to the man that never got picked up? He died of a brain aneurysm, the ambulance never came.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops