Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

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BIG PENIS

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

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One drunk bug looks over to another drunk bug and guess what it says? Your a glitch

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What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

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nathan palmer has a big head !

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AROUND

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Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

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how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

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what is white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? a refrigerator.

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

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What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

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Two people walk into a bar, the third one ducked.

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How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

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99% of guys are hot. The other 1% go to my school.

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What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

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yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

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I won the game.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What do you get when you cross a porcupine with party balloons? Unhappy kids

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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