Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

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what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

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Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

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Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

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A horse walks in a bar. Several people leave seeing the potential danger in the situation.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

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Knock Knock Come in.

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How did the man become sterilized? Blow-dart through the testicle.

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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A deer walked into a hunter's bar... and was shot.

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Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

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KIMBERLEY HONEY

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Why did the girl hang up on her boyfriend? Because the roof collapsed on her.

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Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

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Want to hear a joke? Womens rights

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as it is capable of. Personally depends on the weight of the wood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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