What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

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Q: What's worse than tripping down the stairs in front of a crowd of people? A: The bombing of Hiroshima

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why are balck people black because they are

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Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

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What's the difference between Elmo and Cookie Monster? One of them doesn't listen to Michelle Obama

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

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Q: what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill? A: mudslide

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One night, a man was bitten by Dracula. The first thing to come out of his mouth was "Joke's on you, I have AIDS!" Then proceeded to laugh hysterically until Dracula snapped his neck

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I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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My favorite part of the movie Frozen is when the parents die.

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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why did sally fall off the swings she had no arms knock knock whos there not sally

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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Roses are red, violets are blue, the little midget is coming for you. If you don't run and if you don't hide, you will probably be stepped on because of my incredible big size.

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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antonis sister is mighty fine

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because last year, when 6 was going to the gas station, 7 approached him and said "gimme all your money or else I'll shoot you". 6 was so scared he ran away crying. About a few days later 6 spots 7 again and this time he was with 9. He said "yo 6! If you don't give me your money, im gonna do this to you!" and then 7 started biting and chewing 9 as if he was some kind of cannibal. 6 ran away and called the police. He told him that 7 ate 9.

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A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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