What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

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1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

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why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

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Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? It's Doctor Green. I've got some bad news about your test results. Can I come in?

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

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Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops