A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Shltskc gw? G

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Find a half-worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

thumb_up thumb_down +25

If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

thumb_up thumb_down +23

knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How did the man die? He was killed alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,8

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops