How do you make a small child cry? You cut off his fingers..

What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

#Getweird

I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Kidding, not trucing, Dylan sucks prick. Brock likes his mums butt.

Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

Why was the woman on video chat? She was videochatting with her husband, he was out of town.

Guess what What

Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

An Asian with a big dick.

Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

They say laughter is the best medicine but i've always found it hard to laugh at cancer.

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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