Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

Knock knock... Home invasion

To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

Indians

What's the difference between black guy and a bucket of shit? The bucket

How do you know a black man's been in your backyard? If you throw a barbecue and your friends of African-American descent decide to bring cold cuts.

Knock, knock. Come in.

Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

how many mexicas does it take to.... on wait there done

Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

Just think...there are 7 billion people in the world...so that's 14 billion orgasms!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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