two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

What did Superman say to Batman when they first met? Nothing. They are not real.

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? You shouldn't call him anything. He needs help. -Tag

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

America's Got Talent WIN! Britian's Got Talent WIN! Mexico's Got Talent WTF!

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

Knock knock! Who's there? Alan okay come in

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

Who invented chocolate? I don't know! Keep it to yourself.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

Why was the prostitute's throat sore? Allergies.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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