- Anti Joke

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

whats the difference between ian bothom and david gower? shredded wheat.

Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

knock knock Whos there? (the boy who knocked proceeds to run away with laughter)

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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