Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

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What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? An opera singer singing in the shower

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Why didn't Rosa Parks get her fat black ass up? Because she was an avid partier and had anal with roughly 8 different guys the night before.

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

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So, im new at this site and i was wondering how do you make an anti joke?

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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2 gay guys walk into the bar guy #1 say lets get drunk guy #2 says lets get wasted then #1 says... what do they do fall on the floor and do it.

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

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Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

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Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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wanna hear a joke? i dont like kids wanna hear a lie? im typing with two hands wanna hear a another? my hand isnt on my weiner

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Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

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yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

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69

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Why does everyone tell black jokes? Because everyone hates black people.

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do you know cadbury choclate buttons? yeah, you know the white ones come out now, do you why? so the black kids can get there face dirty too

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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