A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

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What happens when your first name is Newton? You get nicknamed NEWT

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A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

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A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

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You're so sweet I have diabetes

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

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What does the average fishermen catch Fish

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

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What did the black guy say to the white guy running off the cliff? Watch out! You're running off a cliff!

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Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

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Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

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Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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