You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he was on his wheelchair.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? Black people don't celebrate Christmas.

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

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There is a bus driving down the street, suddenly a man jumps out of the buss and splatters on to the sidewalk, why does he jump out? the buss driver was asian

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A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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Yo mama so fat, she was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes and has been instructed by her physician to exercise and regularly monitor her blood glucose levels.

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What's the difference between a person who can differentiate an anti-joke from a joke and one who cannot? Other than being able to tell the difference between the two types of humour, it is impossible to tell, as no further information is given.

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One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

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Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

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what do the students call their red-headed friend? Mike.

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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Why did the man eat the apple? He had just witnessed a cow butchering and decided to become a vegitarian the moment he got home. He now lives in 1st degree depression because of what he saw 2 hours ago.

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What happens if you drop an yellow shirt into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

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Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

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Tucker Rivera

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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