Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How did the little boy get lost? He didnt he got dragged into a van and was raped violently.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

knock knock. whos there? the police. we have news about your daughter. She has been tortured and raped and you will never see her again for the man that took her has taken her out of our jurisdiction.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

how do you kill a blonde with a pistol Put the clip in and shoot her

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the priest go to jail? He had sexual relations with young boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did Gina laugh? Because something was funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Answer: because he had no guts

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

a robber walks into a bank. he steals everything and kills the guards

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops