A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

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Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

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What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

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How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

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what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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"Never trust what the internet says." - Abraham Lincoln

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How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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A Jewish person had a robber in their house. Who broke in? Adolf Hitler

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Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

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Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

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What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

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Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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whats fun about the governement's jokes? nothing, they are actually serious

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What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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It is so hot out here, that it could melt an ice cube that was once in the freezer!

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Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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